Today, I am feeling lonely. Today, I am in my feelings. And you know what? I’m okay with it. There is nothing wrong with feeling your feelings. You just can’t get stuck in them. I’ve gotten caught in that trap too many times. I’ve been down that road of depression. I don’t want to be there again. But at the same time, it’s okay to feel feelings.
I can’t just bottle them up and keep pushing them down. Down to the point where it gets so compressed that the pressure becomes too much and I explode with emotion at the most inopportune of moments.
It’s okay to take a day and feel feelings. It’s okay to take a day and cry. It’s okay to scream. And there is nothing wrong with not being okay for a moment. It’s okay if it takes a moment to really figure out why you are not okay. It’s okay to not have it all together all the time.
It’s okay to take a moment to yourself. It’s okay to go to someone and break down.It’s okay to accept a hug and admit that you need to be held for a minute. It’s okay to do what you need to do to feel your feelings and get out your emotions. We all have them and we all have to deal with them.
I can’t be scared to not tell people things anymore. I can’t be scared that no on will listen and that no one will care. I can’t be scared that people are going to judge me. I can’t be scared that I will be let down again. Because this is all going to happen. Failure and heartache and disappointments are part of life. They are unavoidable. And I don’t have to pretend like I’m okay when I experience them. Sometimes it’s okay to not be okay.
Why do we as women think that we have to hold it all together? I know that many men do this too. But why, if I am a “strong” woman, can I not have a moment where I let myself fall apart and admit that I’m not okay?
Yes I know there is a plan a purpose for everything. But this is not easy. This hurts and is lonely and is uncharted territory, that I am not familiar with. I don’t know what to do or think or say. Yes, I am strong and yes I know it’ll be worth it. But today, I’m lonely. Today, I’m hurting. Today, I’m in my feelings. Today, I don’t know what to do. Today, I don’t want to be alone. Today, I need encouragement and love. Today, I want to think about me and care about me and worry about me.
I really am blessed and have so much. But today, I am in my feelings and my hurts and confusion. And you know what…it’s okay