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Will I ever feel it and truly receive it?

Can I accept it?

Am I blind to it or pushing it away?

Can I truly show it?

Am I scared?

Do I know what it really means?

I have an idea of what it means…I think

But am I demonstrating it?

Or I am just caught up in my old world?

Am I caught up in my own idea

My own expectations

Of what I think that it should look like

So for now I’m shutting down

Dreaming of a possibility

That maybe one day it will be true

Until then I’m going to learn to love

I’m going to learn to love me

Because most days

I don’t

And how can I love anyone else?

If I can’t really love me.

 

These are my Sunday night thoughts.

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