Will I ever feel it and truly receive it?
Can I accept it?
Am I blind to it or pushing it away?
Can I truly show it?
Am I scared?
Do I know what it really means?
I have an idea of what it means…I think
But am I demonstrating it?
Or I am just caught up in my old world?
Am I caught up in my own idea
My own expectations
Of what I think that it should look like
So for now I’m shutting down
Dreaming of a possibility
That maybe one day it will be true
Until then I’m going to learn to love
I’m going to learn to love me
Because most days
And how can I love anyone else?
If I can’t really love me.
These are my Sunday night thoughts.